August 2005 Malaysia
Into the pub she walked that night,
yellow socks knee length, tight pink mini skirt,
earrings, bracelets, big boots gleaming bright,
and her Abergavenny Thursday AFC shirt.
I’d seen her before, but this was the first time
she’d shown any real interest in me;
in her hand, a large rum and coke with a thick chunk of lime
that she rested on her Pippa Longstocking knee.
Using her hand to blow away the smoke,
she twisted her fingers in her lion mane hair.
‘You’re a funny sort of person, a strange kind of bloke.
What do you do at the weekends? Do you go anywhere?’
I listen to con…
‘Oh, I’m a big fan of Westlife, I’m a big fan of Eastlife,
I’m a big fan of Southlife, and Northlife too.
I’m a big fan of Geldof, Bon Jovi, and Bono,
I’m a big fan of Def Leppard, Dumb Lion, and U2.’
I said ‘You’re a big fan of the boys who make noise.’
‘Yeah.’ She smiled and bit her lower lip,
closed her eyes, and said with a sigh,
'yeah, I think so,’ then had a sip
of her drink, ‘Who d’you like, and why?’
‘I’m a big fan of pretty girls with thick curls,
just like you.’
‘Yeah?’ The light in her eyes came into play.
‘What do you do?’ she asked, chewing on her gum.
‘I just come in here, I don’t go away.’
‘No. I mean what do you do now the weekend’s come?’
She sighed, then put the gum in the ashtray.
‘I watch a bit of T...
‘Oh, I’m a big fan of soaps, I’m a big fan of cartoons,
I’m a big fan of almost any type of sport,
I’m a big fan of reality shows and pop concerts,
I’m a big fan of drama that take place in court.’
‘What else do you do?’
‘I enjoy watching them cook...’
‘Oh, I’m a big fan of food like chicken burger and chips,
I’m a big fan of scrambled eggs and honey on toast,
I’m a big fan of spaghetti and pizza with cheese,
I’m a big fan of hotdogs with tomato and onion,
I’m big fan of most types of Indian and Chinese.’
I could in her eyes she was so far away,
her accent cutting the beer perfumed smoke;
she turned to the barman and said, ‘Rik, hey,
get me another large rum, lime and coke.’
‘Enough about me; what are you a big fan of? How do you have fun?
What do you like to do, how, where, and why?’
I said ‘I’m a big fan of just about anyone
who turns off, or unplugs the mains supply.’
‘Why? Why is that?’
‘Because I’m a big fan.’
‘Oh. Oh, that’s why you’re up there, is it?’
‘Yes.’
‘You’re not at work now?’
‘No, only in the summer. Winter, I’m in hibernation.’
‘That’s a football team in Scotland, isn’t it? Newcastle, or Glasgow or somewhere.’
‘No, hibernation.’
‘Oh. Rik. Where’s my drink? Rik, what’s hibernation mean? How do you spell it?’
